CREATIVE OVERWORK & OVERWHELM

 

 Hello again, the last ten days have been a whirlwind of emotions for me. An evening out with my husband in London, which is very rare but lovely!! Plus a big weekend away attending an 80th family birthday party. This required me to leave my family at home without me for a night, which I never hardly do!! Then I travelled with my older sister back to our childhood town, located in the North of England. The decision to go was about honouring my promise to think more about myself & take some time to enjoy myself whenever the opportunity comes my way. Instead of saying no, saying yes!! A big one for me as I can usually talk myself out of anything these days. But being brave & positive I was ready to embark on this much needed journey.

  I am so glad I did as it was a wonderfully rich evening full of love & laughter.


 I had also decided it was time to start getting back to creating some interesting collage work? 


This has been harder than I thought. I began with the idea of gathering lots of photographic images relating to my new design. Recently being pulled more towards my love of the cornish coast & it's surrounding countryside I felt the title would be simply, "COAST". The many shades of blue, brown, beige, grey, soft sand yellow, muted green & white I find so relaxing for my often over busy head!! I also find rock, wood, glass & metal very interesting materials. Interior decoration including soft furnishings, paint & accessories are something I have always enjoyed researching. We have recently painted our house using softer more neutral shades echoing the colours of a seaside landscape. We all find it is a much more soothing interior which works for us, as we spend so much time at home together.

 Sometimes when life gets very tense & difficult these colours help to comfort us in a soft blanket of care.   


It was difficult to find the right time to begin, so I really forced myself to get started. I felt unsure as to the outcome, which is probably where I went wrong?!


With my early collages I always had a strong idea of what I was looking to achieve, but this time I was't sure. To be honest I felt overwhelmed by the project I had set myself. It was the largest sized canvas I had worked on.


I never have the right place to sit, having used three different work areas to date. Anyway I settled on the conservatory position, as I love the light it gives me. Unfortunately the rest of my family seemed to gravitate to be in there too, our eldest daughter sitting tightly behind me doing her blog posts, our youngest daughter playing FIFA with her dad on xbox inbetween the world cup games on TV!!! I felt squashed & uncomfortable. Not the best environment for create great things perhaps? The dining table will be my home when I return & tea on trays will take place on my creative days. It seems to work quite well whilst watching the football?! Sorry for the dig!! Can you tell I am loving the tournament?!

I dabbled with the inital playing of colours & groupings. Then prepared the layout from which to add colour. This was looking really effective. 

 I then started to feel unsure as to how to go ahead with the colour, so I played safe using greys, whites, yellows & blues.

It was looking good until I overworked it!

 Not yet satisfied with this soft image, I continued to work on it some more. I so wish I hadn't!

I had been in a difficult mood during the day & felt frustrated with other things going on for me. It seemed to pass over to my creative decision making. My judgement was wrong, just echoing my increasingly aggitated mood.

I woke during the night & was awake for three hours feeling anxious & uneasy about all sorts of stuff & my creative collage. I made a few decisions in the middle of the night I rather wish I had ignored today!

The finished result is overworked & has lost it's beautiful softness. It has been disappointing, but maybe a lesson in knowing when something is ok & to be left alone. When it is perfect already. When it is as good as it can be without you keeping on overdoing it! Easier said than done. But something I need to work on with future designs.

 This end result is way off what I imagined. I will see it as a learning curve. Remembering to go with my instincts & to leave something alone when it is as good as it can be.


I will work on my frame of mind this week, rather than a canvas frame. I need to be in a better place within myself before I approach another design. Maybe some small sketches would help me find my way? We shall see? Sharing my creative process with you today.



Many thanks for reading my blog post today.

Until next time, take care.
xx