GOOD NEWS 

BAD NEWS

& 

EVEN BETTER NEWS

Hello again, I must of written this blog a thousand times in the early hours of the morning, lying in my bed having difficulty sleeping. Sometimes I just push words & the days events around in my mind until I can wait no more. Spilling out my thoughts that have taken up so much space in my busy head for too many days & turning them into a blog post is my way of processing my emotions & expressing my feelings surrounding my life as a wife, mum, carer & autism advocate for our two daughters.

The good news is surrounding our youngest daughter with ASD plus anxiety disorder & her recent settling into her half day, short stay, medical needs school. She has really begun to open up her tightly closed wings, over the past 5 weeks. It has been so beautiful to watch after her 9 months at home, unable to attend her new Secondary School in September 2014. It is early days but we are all so proud of her & how she has handled herself throughout this very stressful & upsetting time, at such a delicate age.

The bad news is surrounding our eldest daughter who has ASD & struggles with depression. Her meltdowns have really increased to daily & since last October 2014 she has sadly been unable to attend her medical needs school.  

I am thankful & grateful that she is now getting more support than ever before, being transfered to a different autism team.  Also I have strongly avocated for the need for her to have 1-1 support in a more suitable school environment for post 16 over the next 2 years. This plan is called an Educational Health care plan (EHC plan). I have worked hard providing lots of information in support of the application, as school felt she could cope without this? Her presentation at school is what they call "Masking" until she arrives home & then has a massive 2 hour meltdown. Her medication has also been changed & other health care options are being discussed as possibles?

It has been a very frightening time for our family coping & caring for our daughter when she is such pain & confusion. The meltdowns are very long & incredibly exhausting for all of us. Feeling drained is an understatement afterwards. Also being prepared for the sudden onset of one leaves everyone feeling anxious & on edge. Her loving sister always trys to offer her help too, as it so distressing to see her older sister during these times without feeling totally helpless. She is a true star & is a very strong & compassionate young lady with an enormous heart of gold.

I have taken my pain & recently started my own Facebook personal blog page raising autism awareness by sharing posts, articles & my blogs plus images chosen from Pinterest that help me to get through my day with a calmer heart & stronger soul. I will continue for as long as it feel right, as with my blogging too.

The even better news is our family holiday to a beautiful hot & sunny resort for a week. We decided we really needed a break away together after 6 years of uncertain times for our girls with many different chapters leading up to their eventual diagnosis of ASD.

I was thinking, it has been there all the time since they were born. The memories are still vivid & painful for both myself & my husband now we know why our girls struggled with so many things, that friends children did not? 

My tears came about 3 nights ago. Our daughters said it was good to see I had emotions & to let it go. I have fought for so many years my tears had frozen & only momentarily unfreezing when someone said something kind or did something to help our girls without a struggle on my part. That brought tears to my eyes with utter gratitude for the ease & kindness that was being shown to me. But that night I could not stop & I needed to acknowledge my pain & actually just how many professionals I had met & talked to, argued with, listened to & agreed with during that 6 years.

 IT TOOK MY BREATH AWAY

 

So looking forward to our much needed respite & wishing for good moments, cherished memories & sunny smiles on our special break away together.

Thank you for reading my blog post today.

Until next time, take care.

xx

All images are taken from Pinterest